Bonnie Susie Cleland

I'm listening to KBCS online. KBCS is a community radio station, and it's got everything from very Democrat programs (blam about the status quo and the president, basically) to wonderful programs like Folksounds, done by Eric Hardee and Jean Brendecke. Anyway, one of those Democrat programs is going on right now, CounterSpin, and I'm waiting for Folksounds. I think that someone on the show this edition is surnamed "Cleland" or something like that, which immediately made me think about "Bonnie Susie Cleland to be buried in Dundee."

I like tragic ballads, stupid or no, because they're interesting. Most of the time, the folks in the ballads are worse off than the singer, and yet any sorrow the singer has and any empathy or sympathy can be thrown in and be mixed in. And, besides, many of these tunes have the best tunes. So, that's why I like them, though I'm very soft-hearted and can't even bear to watch The Empire Strikes Back without closing my eyes about four times.

But "Bonnie Susie Cleland" is just horrorific. I've heard that the events described here might have really happened, and that horrifies me. It's worse than "Omie Wise", though that one is based on a true story.

The premise is that Susie Cleland, a pretty Scottish girl, has fallen in love with an English soldier. Her father and brothers are horrified and demand that she renounce her love and abandon him. She tells them that she won't, and so the father and brothers decide to take action--but not against the soldier, which would make some sense, nor by locking up Susie herself, which makes sense, as well.

No. Susie's family should be in Seattle--their motto is "There's got to be a harder, more complex way to deal with this." But I'm not about to go on and on about how Seattle takes forever to get around to doing stuff (even though it's true) because there aren't any Seattleites in the song. The point is, Susie's brothers get a big pile of wood, and...well, I don't even want to finish this, but they get a big pile of wood and Susie's father gets a stake, and then they tie her to the stake, and...have you read about the Spanish Inquisition? Something like that.

Now, that in and of itself is a bit extreme. There are plenty of other ways to deal with an English lover, I'd think, but burning one's daughter or sister at the stake seems rather...well...

What are you trying to do, Mr. Cleland? Are you trying to punish your daughter? Are you trying to protect her? Or are you trying to teach her lover a lesson? There are better ways to do it!!!

I suppose I better get off my soapbox now. Why start yelling at someone in a song? It won't change anything. I better just go find the happy ending version...